By Katherine Baker, LCSW, Courier & Press, Tuesday, Oct. 31, 2017 –
Unfortunately, all too often we hear stories in the media about children and teens being neglected. Neglect can take many forms, including lack of housing, food and medical care, failure to teach basic personal care, and withholding love and affection. In neglect situations, the child’s basic needs are not being met by the parent.
For many families there seems to be a “disconnect” between meeting a child’s needs and strengthening the bonds of love, affection, care and support. Parents can neglect their children for multiple reasons – loss of a job causing financial strain, loss of public utilities, depression, parent inattention due to involvement with a love interest, addiction to cell phones, or abuse of alcohol and other substances.
As a school social worker, I see the effects of neglect every day. In this writer’s opinion, emotional neglect may do the most damage.
Neglect can leave a permanent scar on a child’s self-esteem and well-being. Self-esteem is defined as confidence in one’s own worth or abilities and tends to fluctuate depending on what is going on in your life.
Children that are left alone, unsupervised, and don’t have regular one-on-one time with a parent frequently have unmet emotional needs. They are not taught the importance of values, morals, and respect for self and others.
Spending quality time with your children should be a priority. However, many children and teens do not get this much-needed attention from parents. They are alone, unsupervised, and left to their own defenses.
On the other hand, children that have actively involved parents tend to have better self-esteem, make better decisions, are better able to respond to the stress of day-to-day living, and are able to verbalize their needs in a healthy manner. The time you spend with your children in elementary school, middle school and high school will promote healthy and responsible relationships.
A big part of parenting is being the parent and not your child’s friend. In addition to spending quality time with children, parents should make rules and enforce them, give advice, show love, care, and respect, role model positive and encouraging behaviors and discipline when needed. If a parent is absent these skills are lost, as the child must meet his own needs and function as a mini-adult rather than a child.
Some children who are emotionally neglected become angry and sullen. Others become depressed, develop unhealthy dating relationships, demonstrate poor academic performance, and may show little respect for others or themselves. Showing your child you love them even when their behavior is troubling can go a long way toward building a healthy relationship.
If you are a parent, guardian, or caregiver, make time in your busy schedule – or better yet – eliminate some of the commitments you have and start nurturing and loving your children. Put down the cell phone and talk to your kids. Teach your children how to communicate face-to-face versus the push of a button. Give your children the love and attention we all need and make sure their basic needs are met.Their future – and their ability to relate to others in our world – depends on it.
FAQs
Unfortunately, all too often we hear stories in the media about children and teens being neglected. Neglect can take many forms, including lack of housing, food and medical care, failure to teach basic personal care, and withholding love and affection.
Why is it important to meet the emotional needs of a child? ›
Children of all ages need to feel supported, loved, valued, accepted, and safe. Meeting children's emotional needs increase their resilience and helps them in building a strong foundation for future success in school, work, relationships, and throughout their life.
What is physical and emotional needs of children? ›
It is easy for us to identify a child's physical needs: nutritious food, warm, clean clothes, a roof over their heads, routine bedtimes, medical care when needed. However, a child's mental and emotional needs may not be so obvious. Good emotional health helps children to develop socially and learn new skills.
What are the 4 basic needs of children for their optimal development? ›
Kids must feel safe and sound, with their basic survival needs met: shelter, food, clothing, medical care and protection from harm.
How to help a child with emotional problems? ›
While this is naturally learned over time, there are ways you can help your child cultivate emotional awareness and adopt healthy coping skills now.
- Validate their feelings.
- Help children name their emotions.
- Empower them with information.
- Set realistic expectations.
- Teach them coping skills.
- Separate feelings and behaviors.
Feeling loved is the most important emotional need of a child. Children need lots of reminders like hugs, kisses and words to develop emotional security. They also need practice in talking about it. “I feel loved when…..” “I show you how much I love you when I….”
What happens when a child emotional needs aren't met? ›
Children who experience emotional neglect may be unable to perceive themselves and their worth accurately. A 2021 study that examined the impact of child maltreatment and neglect found a link between maltreatment and neglect and low self-esteem and depressive symptoms.
Are physical needs more important than emotional needs? ›
You need both to be truly connected and to thrive. They are both important and absolutely necessary to have a relationship that stands the test of time. With physical intimacy and emotional intimacy comes a lot of different viewpoints, opinions, and pieces of (not so great) advice out in the world today.
What are the three main areas of children's needs? ›
Healthy development means that children of all abilities, including those with special health care needs, are able to grow up where their social, emotional and educational needs are met.
What are the 4 emotional needs of a child? ›
Love, security and acceptance should be at the heart of family life. Children need to know that your love does not depend on his or her accomplishments. Mistakes and/or defeats should be expected and accepted. Confidence grows in a home that is full of unconditional love and affection.
The child's most basic need is to be safe, therefore the risk to health of serious illness, injury, exploitation or abuse, and the need for shelter, food and warmth, will be given the highest priority.
What are the 3 R's of early childhood? ›
Remember, the 3R's of Early Learning: Relationships, Repetition, Routines are the foundation for supporting brain development and early learning.
What are the basic care needs of a child? ›
Basic Care
Providing for the child's physical needs, and appropriate medical and dental care. Includes provision of food, drink, warmth, shelter, clean and appropriate clothing and adequate personal hygiene.
Which is the most common emotional problem for children? ›
Mental health disorders (MHD) are very common in childhood and they include emotional-obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), anxiety, depression, disruptive (oppositional defiance disorder (ODD), conduct disorder (CD), attention deficit hyperactive disorder (ADHD) or developmental (speech/language delay, intellectual ...
What are the causes of emotional problem of a child? ›
that could be affecting the behavior; school problems (relationships or learning problems) that are creating additional stress; experimenting with drug use or alcohol for an adolescent or older teen; or. changes in the family (divorce, new child, death) that may cause concern for the child.
How do you know if your child has emotional problems? ›
Warning signs that your child may have a mental health disorder include: Sadness that lasts two or more weeks. Changes in being social or staying away from others. Hurting oneself or talking about hurting oneself.
What are the physical needs of a child? ›
A young child's basic physical needs, include:
- Food (nutritious and age-appropriate)
- Shelter (protection from harm)
- Warmth.
- Clean air and environment.
- Health and dental care.
- Activity and rest.
Child physical health is more than just tracking their height and weight. It also includes making sure they have good nutrition, enough physical activity, restful sleep, timely immunizations, and strong dental health.
What is the difference between physical and emotional needs? ›
Physical needs are for the body whereas psychological needs are for the soul. Physical needs are temporary, whereas the needs of consciousness or soul are continuous. Food is a Physical need, once the stomach is full, we can't eat it anymore. So the physical needs (bodily needs) are temporary and limited.
What are emotional needs in child development? ›
Children need to feel that they are living and learning in a safe environment and that the adults in their lives are working to keep them from physical and emotional harm. They need parents to protect their feelings and not put them in situations in which they cannot succeed.
