Being an ambivert is like being an introvert on some of the days and being an extrovert on the others. For those of you who think it’s the best of both worlds, let me break it you that it isn’t. You can’t decide when to unleash your extrovert side and when to stay in the introvert covers. It’s not that simple. It’s not something you get to choose and that’s what makes it difficult. In a world divided between introverts and extroverts, you find yourself in the middle of both as an ambivert.
Here are the struggles that any ambivert can relate to:
1. Deciding between going out or staying in, is always a dilemma.
You never know when you want to go out or when you like to spend your whole day in bed. In the night, you’re quite sure about going out the next day but when the day comes you realize you’d rather spend it at your home all alone. You assumed it to be your extrovert day but it ended up being your introvert one and you can’t really help it.
2. Always have mixed feeling about the social gathering.
‘What the hell am I doing here?’ That’s what goes on your mind when you’re in a social gathering during one of your introvert days. But then at times, you enjoy spending time with a lot of people around you. You simply don’t know whether you like being around people or you don’t. And trust me, it doesn’t really depend on the people you’re with sometimes everyone can be annoying cause you’re just in a different mood.
3. Everyone thinks you’re in a bad mood when it’s one of your introvert days.
Imagine you’re spending your extrovert days with them and then all of a sudden the introvert monster inside you takes over. Now you’re all quiet and sort of annoyed when someone is trying to make a conversation. Everyone around you will start asking if you’re in a bad mood and that’s just annoying. People simply can’t take ‘I’m fine’ as an answer. Your energy gets drained sometimes and it’s normal, which they clearly don’t understand.
4. You’re in a roller coaster of mood swings.
The constant mood of an extrovert is far different from the mood of an introvert. So now when I say they keep changing between being an extrovert and an introvert, it clearly means they’re in a different mood every other day. Or maybe in a different mood at the different time of the day because you never know which monster might take over. It’s like a little ongoing war between two different personalities.
5. You have a large circle of friends but don’t like spending a lot of time with them.
There’s no doubt about it that you have a large number of friends because you love meeting new people. But the problem arises when you have to meet them occasionally but you don’t always feel like it because you need a lot of alone time as well. So you end up with friends who are always annoyed at you for not picking up calls and cancelling all the plans. It’s just really hard to maintain a large number of friends when you have an introvert inside you. But keeping a small circle of friends isn’t possible because of the extrovert side of yours. So you’re just screwed eventually.
6. Making plans for the weekend is always a struggle.
There are people who like to make plans for the weekend days before. But the problem is you don’t know how you want to spend your weekend. You can’t decide for the person you will be on weekend. You probably don’t even know the kind of person you’ll be on the weekend. So making plans for the future isn’t something that works for you. But you do make plans just to cancel them at the last moment and you’re okay with everyone judging you for that.
7. You simply can’t balance your social life.
Balancing your social life is something you’re always caught up with. Sometimes you feel like uninstalling all the social networking apps and disable all the notifications. Or maybe just switch off your phone and throw it away. But then there are times when you find yourself texting five different people at the same time. You don’t have a constant social life. The extroverts and introverts don’t understand you when you talk about your social life. It’s more complex than their love life.
8. Going out sounds fun as long as your extrovert side is in control.
For the ambiverts, going out sounds so exciting but as soon as an introvert monster takes the driving seat, you’re doomed then going out feels like a burden and you start rethinking all your life decisions. You wonder if you know yourself anymore because you just can’t stick to one side. First, you want to go out but then when it’s time to leave you to realise you don’t really feel like leaving the house.
9. Wanting to be around people but don’t want to communicate.
You feel like being around people because somewhere you know they give you good and positive vibes and energy but the problem arises when they start initiating a conversation. What they don’t understand is if you want to be around people, it doesn’t always mean you want to engage in a conversation. This is why you like going to cafes alone, where you can be around people and still have all the space you want. You get to observe everyone around you without having to initiate a conversation.
10. You like running into people but want that encounter to end as soon as possible.
It’s fun for you to run into people when you’re out but you don’t really appreciate small talk so you expect that encounter to end as soon, as possible. It usually converts into that awkward conversation where you’re looking at each other but don’t know what to say. Then you wish you never met them in the first place and you sort of starts loathing such sudden meaningless encounters. But somewhere inside your head, you still find it interesting.
11. You can’t maintain a routine no matter how hard you try.
No matter how many times you’ve tried to stick to a routine but you simply can’t. Your mood swings don’t let you do what you decided and you always end up doing something else. Now that doesn’t count as a routine if you keep changing it every day according to your mood and ease. But you’re an ambivert and you can’t really blame it on anyone so you decide to screw the idea of routine and do everything as you like.
12. You need a little change every once in a while.
When you’re an ambivert, you crave for a little change once in a while because a constant life isn’t in your dictionary. You want every day to be a little different than the other. Sometimes you want to feel like spending the whole day out with your friends and the next day, you realise what you really want is to stick to your bed. You love meeting and talking to new people cause they bring new vibes to your life.
13. You want to be in the centre of attraction but only if it doesn’t last long.
You love being in the spotlight and where you can get all the attention you, want. But too much of it makes you exhausted. You like attention but only if it’s limited cause too much of anything gets you annoyed. Sometimes you feel like sitting in a corner like you’re invisible to everyone else and avoid any kind of attention. But there are days where you can actually become a drama queen. If it’s one of your extrovert days so there’s no harm in it.
14. You can engage in a small talk but you don’t really appreciate it.
Unlike the introverts, you can be pretty good at the small talk and that’s when people start to think you like such talks. But the truth is you despise small talk just as much as introverts. You’re just not bad at it because of your extrovert monster. You always find yourself stuck in such meaningless conversations and wonder why were you even talking to that person. It’s an ongoing struggle really.
15. Nobody really understands you but you’re okay with it.
You’re always in a different mood and making different decisions. Because of all that, nobody really understands. The close ones think they do but the truth is, they don’t. But the bottom line is, you’re okay with people not understanding you as you never understand yourself. Ambiverts are an unpredictable mess.
If you’re an ambivert and you don’t agree to any of my points, feel free to add your comments.
